понедельник, 20 октября 2008 г.

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Iapos;ve long known that friendship is a two-way thing. Undeniably, sometimes, I�do tend to prioritize certain friends. Well, who doesnapos;t, seriously. Since I�entered JC, I tried to keep in touch with my sec school friends, which I still do, or at least try to. I�tried to make new friends, and learn to rely on them, and of course, to be there for them. I�guess, 4 years of friendship can never ever compare to 1, 2 years of friendship. I never knew time played such a great factor, or not. Maybe there are other things that played a part. Whatever it is, I have no more energy to try to find out, anymore.

Whatapos;s happened in my life, whatapos;s yet to happen, God, I have no more faith to carry on each day. Every tomorrow is so tormenting, and at the end of the day, I wonder how I�survived. Maybe You really are there for me. Days, I face these cold, expressionless faces in school. This world is really so realistic, isnapos;t it?

Theyapos;re friends with you because they think youapos;re stupid and therefore hanging out with you makes them feel smarter, more superior.
When results show otherwise, they ignore you, like as if you committed a grave mistake.
I donapos;t care actually, but whatapos;s happened is that my other friends are being influenced by her. Though they donapos;t show it, feelings are much more accurate.�
Iapos;m beginning to enjoy solitude a lot more, honestly. Iapos;m not a loner, in case you were thinking, but now, all I�want to do is indulge in the times where things were happier (ie Sec 4). Silly to think of the past which never will return, but I�guess thatapos;s what I truly hope to experience once more.
In case you were wondering, no itapos;s not everyone, and itapos;s not the majority. Iapos;m not as pathetic as you think I am. And, there are of course other things thatapos;s eating my brains.
I think in this world, the only people who really love you unconditionally are your parents. Not even your siblings, not even your closest friend, but parents. I canapos;t believe Iapos;m actually saying this, especially when my dad just yelled at me and my mum just scolded me.
My thoughts are not straight now, how sad.

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